Chipotle Shrinks Bowls—Dad Nostalgia Hits New Highs

Chipotle Shrinks Bowls—Dad Nostalgia Hits New Highs

Chipotle has officially entered its "just vibes" era. Once hailed as the GOAT of fast-casual dining, it’s now serving up heartbreak one tiny bowl at a time.

According to leaks from the Chipotle subreddit (yes, that’s a thing), employees are sharing photos of new bowls that are way smaller. Like, airline snack-level smaller.

And just like that, every dad in America is preparing their speech:

"Back in my day, Chipotle gave you burritos the size of a newborn child—for eight bucks!"

Imagine it:

Little League’s over, the kids are starving, and Dad pulls into Chipotle like it’s 2013.

Only this time, he’s staring into a $12 thimble of rice and disappointment.

Let’s not forget:

Chipotle prices are up.

Portions are down.

And the only thing getting stuffed these days? The corporate profit margins.

At this rate, future Chipotle meals will come with a magnifying glass and a waiver not to sue for emotional damage

The fall from grace is real. 2013 Chipotle would never.